Sunday, September 26, 2010

Congratulations! You're normal.

Subtitle: In which doing something that about 50% of the population can do changed me.

Ever since I can remember, when I would explain my disability to someone, she (and it was almost always she) would get a very concerned look on her face and ask me, "oh, are you going to be able to have children?"  Now, there is nothing about my disability (fused hip joint, mild spina bifida) that would make conception more difficult than it is for anyone else, but certainly it was always a question in my mind whether I would be able to push a baby out through my abnormal pelvis.  In fact, if I'm being honest (and really isn't that what having a blog is about?) I always just assumed I would have a scheduled c-section.

Even after all the consultations with obstetricians and MRIs and examinations and pelvic measurements, and the decision to have a "trial of labour", and being in the hospital and getting to 10cm, and labouring down, and pushing, it wasn't until I could feel and see Toby coming out that it dawned on me, Oh my god, I am doing this.  I am actually delivering my baby.  After all those years of saying "no, I can't" (ride a bike, snowboard, ski, run, do yoga, sit cross-legged, what-have-you), this was my "I can" moment.  Feeling normal, and being treated as normal by the people around me, changed me.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Where I find myself now.

A lot of things have led me to this place. In the last year I have become a mother, learned a lot about myself and what matters to me, and made peace with my body after 30 years.

I have some things to say and I hope that you'll read them, think about them, and engage with me.

I am a critical thinker and I like to think I make my decisions based on the best evidence. Reputation and integrity mean a lot to me. I have a physical disability that impacts almost everything I do every day, and especially the way I choose to/am able to parent.  I think about the world around me and the impact of my decisions and actions on others, the environment and the future.  I am excited to put some of my thoughts about parenting, disability, feminism, public health, law, and other topics out there to the world.